The Devil that is self Harm

Intentionally damaging and injuring the body.

A way of coping.

Bleeding instead of crying, but most of the time doing both.

A visual reminder of the low times in life.

I don’t know what led me to self harm, I don’t remember the first time I did it. I remember punishing myself by not eating, losing weight. I would refuse painkillers for sporting injuries, including  a chronic injury I had as a teenager. I fell out with friends, sometimes protecting them but in the long run upsetting them because I actually thought I deserved to be hated by friends.

As I grew out of the petty school girl arguments, life started kicking in and genuine concerns in life got in the way, leading to more self harming. Now I believe I was quite clever in how I self harmed, I did not self harm deeply as I knew that scars would be too obvious and wounds too obvious. I loved researching injuries and self harm websites, learning how to hide marks, keeping them clean because let’s face it if it gets infected you get caught!! Scars looked lovely but in reality it was important to cover up and keep quiet.

I urge anyone that is having feelings of self harming, or already doing so to get help, because if you don;t then you can really hurt yourself and cause injuries that can haunt you forever. You can contact me through this site if you want advice, I am always here to help! Even if I cannot help myself as well. It is in my nature to help others.

(NHS Direct)

Useful organisations

There are a number of organisations you can contact that offer support and advice for people who self-harm, as well as their friends and families. These include:

Remember : Stay Strong

Stacie-Mai xx

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